Over My Head
by GoldsworthyEdwards24
Summary: An unexpected reunion leads to a rekindled friendship that could quickly turn into something more. But is a relationship what the ex-lovers actually want? Or are they too scared to admit what they need?
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Replacing the Spemma plot in Degrassi Takes Manhattan with a Jiberty plot. JT never died, but I think you already know this.**

University is the worst thing ever invented. I'm not sure why, I don't know how, but ever since I arrived at Toronto University in September, I've hated it.

At least I'm out of that dump and ready to spend the summer back home, visiting the places I grew up. Toby's coming home from hosting his game shows or whatever, and we're meeting up for a summer hang out. Just like old times.

I'm supposed to be meeting him at the Dot for lunch in a half hour, which is exciting on it's own. God, I haven't been to the Dot in forever. I wonder if Spinner still makes that Spinwich of his . . . I laugh at memories, and remember all the fun times I've had at the Dot. It'll be fun going back.

This summer. Me, Toby, Mia. Ah, Mia, my wonderful girlfriend. We've been dating since senior year, and since she was supposed to be graduating today, I'd sent her a present in Paris. She's modelling there, which is great and everything, and I'm proud of her. But it would've been nice to go to her graduation. She's supposed to be visiting sometime in the next couple of days, which is great. It'll be nice to see her again.

As I pulled up at the Dot, I noticed how similar it looked to my memory. Raven paint, scarlet lettering, with the exterior windows looking disfigured everytime I saw them. There were still shabby old Volkswagons and Volvos parked out front, as usual. And I wondered if I'd see anyone recognizeable. Hopefully not, I hardly talk to anyone from high school anymore. Just because my life with friends had gotten pretty weird after I started dating Mia. The past year's been weirdly uneventful, compared to high school, I mean. Maybe it's because of all the people I've seperated myself from. Grandma said I needed to put myself back on track in college, and I guess getting away from all the drama was something I needed to do. Looking back on it, maybe it wasn't such a good idea.

Because as weird as it sounds, I feel like something's been missing for the past year. I mean, I've had Mia and Toby around, just a phone call away, but I don't know. Maybe I've just missed being back home.

I've had the same car for three years now, and here I am still driving it. Has it really been that long? I'm glad we actually own the car and don't have to get it back next year. Too many memories in this old thing, way too many to give up . . . I shake my mind out of reminescment, and climb out of the thing. Admiring the view of the Dot, smiling. Preparing myself for the best summer ever.

I wipe my hands on the sides of my pants, and prepare myself. Heading up the steps, opening the door, and hearing the familiar chime of the bell inside.

Place looked exactly the same, same boring jet black walls, beige wall paper on one side, windows outlooking the view of Degrassi street from the other.

"JT!" I turned to the sound of my name, and saw Emma Nelson and Manny Santos standing there, beaming. I do the same, and the sight of two people I've missed the most. The two of them are standing together, walking towards me.

Emma pulled me into an embrace first, then Manny next. The two of them look different, they were always pretty, and yet somehow they're grown prettier. Emma's blonde hair is lighter, as is her fair smile. Manny's dark hair is shorter, framing her face dilligently, and I notice she's wearing more makeup then she ever did. We laugh together, and I'm glad that we're here together.

"Hey guys, long time, no see."

Emma smiles, and touches my arm. "Tell me about it! You pretty much dropped off the face of the earth,"

I laugh, "Yeah, well, that's what college does to you."

"You could've called though! I invited you to my movie premeire and you were a no-show," Manny exclaimed, and I immeditley felt guilty for ignoring the invitation.

"Really sorry about that by the way," I try. "Mia had a shoot to go to and wanted me to come."

I can see the expressions on their faces change when I said Mia. Like they were now faking smiles, and I really wasn't sure why. She really wasn't something to fake about. I ignored their expressions, and looked away and back again.

"It's fine, fine," said Manny again.

"Come sit down," Emma leads me over to a table in the corner, the same one the three of us and Toby grew up drinking milkshakes at. Seventh grade had come and go a little too quickly for my liking.

Her eyes widen and she confesses, "Ah, the memories of this one."

I chuckle to myself, "Remember the time Toby ate too many fries and barfed over here?"

They laugh, and Manny adds, "Or the time Emma and I ordered extra large burgers and you two had to finish them?"

"Or the time you and –" Emma stopped herself for a couple of seconds, and she and Manny exchanged a look. I wondered who they were talking about, probably Toby. But for some reason, Manny quickly changed the subject.

"Uh . . . JT, you remember my boyfriend, Jay, right?"

Of course I remember Jay. Made me a drug dealer, saved my life after a messy suicide attempt, ruined one of the best relationships I'd ever had . . . I stopped right there, and blinked. I try not to think about her much. "Yeah, we've met," Despite all that though, Jay had always been really good to Manny, so I'd forgiven him for past faults.

"And then we got fake engaged, then real engaged, then broke up after he stole my ring back from a pawn shop?"

"Didn't remember all that . . . but go on," I make movements with my hand and Manny smiles.

"Yep, while we're engaged again." And as if on cue, Jay Hogart comes back from what looks like the bathroom, and I see that he looks diffrerent. He's got a beard now, and the same shaggy hair he had a while ago. He walks over and kisses Manny's cheeks and squints his eyes at me. No matter how confused I am about the engagement.

"JT Yorke? Geez, dude, haven't seen you in a while," he holds out his hand, and I shake it. Guy looks like he's changed, and it's hard to believe him. But if Manny got re-engaged to him, he couldn't be that bad.

"How's it going, Jay?" I ask.

"Eh, it's alright. I should be asking you the same question, Mr. in a coma for two weeks –"

Emma coughs loudly, and tries to stop him from saying more. But Jay's already said too much and I'm forced to remember all the memories from that night. Getting stabbed by some Lakehurst freak isn't something one forgets easily. Espeically missing out on two weeks of my life.

I had always hoped I'd forget about that night. Thinking I was dead, knowing I was dead five seconds after it happened. Afraid I wasn't going to be able to say goodbye to all the people I loved . . .

Emma noticed I was thinking, and slapped me with a napkin, knocking me out of the painful thoughts, and I thanked her mentally. Manny seemed to be scolding Jay for such a comment, as she was hitting his arm numerous times. Oh, my girls.

She quickly tried to change the subject, but couldn't as Toby walked through the Dot door. I smiled, and got up to hug my best friend. Toby still looked exactly the same. Lopsided glasses, short scruffed up hair, square figure. Emma and Manny squealed and hugged him as well.

"Wasn't expecting that, that's for sure." He said softly, and Manny laughed.

"Well we weren't expecting you, Tobey-Tobes," Manny giggled, holding his hands in hers.

"Yeah, what're you doing in Toronto?" asked Emma.

"Toby's taking a break so we can hang here together for the summer," I explained.

"Just like old times," he snaps back and we bump knuckles together. And it really isn't like old times, so much has changed since junior high school. Our innocence, for example. We've all been through so much. And it seems like the four of us aren't the innocent little bunch we were back then. Manny's had an abortion, Emma's gotten a social disease, Toby's seen his friend get shot and me – well, I've got more problems then all of us combined.

Emma puts her arms around the three of us, "The gang's all together again,"

It feels good, my best friends and I, hanging out for the day. My girlfriend visiting in a couple of days.

The rest of the afternoon goes by quickly, and it's almost sad how stressed out I am. Even when I'm not sure why. Toby and Jay talk for a minute, and even though it's weird hanging out with the guy who caused the start of my problems. I shouldn't really be blaming Jay for my issues, though. It's my fault.

Emma tells us about her cross country trip, Manny tells tales about her times on set in Hollywood, and Toby explains his adventures in hosting. My life's not that interesting, and I pretty much just talked about how well Mia was doing, and how nice it was to visit her. And again, everyone seemed uninterested as soon as I mentioned Mia. Even Toby, which surprised me.

The strangest part of the entire afternoon, was that Emma and Manny kept turning around and looking at the door suspiciously. I wonder what they were expecting to happen. Maybe they had somewhere to be. But when I asked them, they answered nonchalantly.

"Oh, no. We don't have to go anywhere," said Emma, her pupils widening.

"Nope, no where," said Manny, still tapping her fingers on the table suspiciously.

"So, JT –" interrupted Toby, like he was trying to hide something. "When's Mia coming?"

I shrugged, "Don't know. You know, she's really famous, and she doesn't really have time. But she said she'll be down here sometime this week,"

Toby raised his eyebrows, and stared at me for a couple of seconds, before shaking it off. Mia loves Toby, she says he's a really sweet guy. And obviously, he doesn't feel the same way about her. I'll have to talk to him about it later.

But suddenly, everything stopped. Manny's phone vibrated, and her entire face lit up in happiness. She quickly slapped it shut, and folded her hands evenly. "JT,"

"Manny,"

"Any other people you've wanted to see since high school?" Manny raised her eyebrows, as Emma hid her face in her hands.

I look at Toby, wondering what they were hinting about. He pushed his lips to the side, biting them as he did so. I raised my eyebrows. "What're you getting at?"

"Oh nothing . . ." But Manny was interrupted as Emma screeched and turned from her conversation with Jay to the front door of the Dot. They ran up to the guest who had just walked in, beaming and going to hug the person.

As soon as I saw who it was though, my heart stopped and I was unable to speak. Someone I hadn't seen since graduation and planned on never seeing again was standing in front of me.

Toby nudged my side, and got up to greet her as well. I closed my eyes, but couldn't seem to stop staring at how beautiful she looked. Her dark hair was straightened, her hazel eyes looking brighter and wider, and she was wearing a blue sundress that fit her well. She stared back when she saw who was looking at her, and smiled her nice smile.

"H-hi, JT," she says.

I'm in awe, and I can't believe just like that she's back in my life. Mia had never liked her, and didn't approve of me speaking with her in high school. We hadn't spoken in ages, and it felt like nothing changed when she said my name. I let out an inaudible breath. Hopefully, life has changed, so I don't mess her up anymore then I already had.

"Hi, Liberty."

**A/N: Cliffhanger time! Review review review please please please! Tell me what you think and should I continue?**


	2. Chapter 2: Breakaway

**A/N: I hope this chapter is better then the first!**

**Pocksuppet- And yes, you will be finding out soon . . . probably in the next couple! Thank you for the great reviews, everyone else!**

She smiled at me, and I stood up, biting the corner of my mouth, ignoring my friends' stares. Liberty walked over towards me, and she looks at me from under her glasses, like she's afraid of saying something. Join the club, I feel like saying.

Emma crossed her arms over her chest, and cleared her throat. "Oh, JT, did we forget to mention? Liberty was coming to visit Manny and I . . ."

" . . . and for Danny's graduation." She finished.

Danny, another person who's too good for me to talk to. Another person who just got sick of me, not that I can blame him. I did knock up his sister . . .

I shook my head, trying not to think about that. "Nice," I stated. "Uh, tell him I said congrats,"

Liberty looked at me, I guess she was surprised that I was saying something more than a hello, as she looked down and back up again. "That's sweet of you. I'll be sure to tell him."

"Yeah, how nice of you, JT," said Toby, and then he winked at me. Why, I'm not really sure. Liberty chewed on her lip and looked away from me. I can't really blame her.

Manny grabbed Jay's arm and started walking away, "Well, uh, we have to um – go check on the – left the iron on, didn't you Emma?"

Emma raised her eyebrows, and then nodded knowingly. "Oh! Yeah, yeah I did. Guys, you wanna come!"

Both Toby and Manny make noises of agreement, and Liberty tried to follow them, but Emma held out her hand and stopped her. "Oh no, Liberty, sweetheart you just got here! Why don't you stay here and have some coffee?"

She shook her head at her, and held up a hand. "No, no, it's fine –"

Manny stepped in front of her once more. I wondered why they really didn't want her to come with them. "That's okay, Lib. You really should stay here and get something to drink –"

Toby quickly jumped from behind her. "Hey, you know, I just got here to. I could want food –"

Emma slammed her palm over his mouth, tugging him back, so that he ran into Jay. Liberty scrunched her eyebrows, looking slightly hurt. I didn't want to be left alone here with her, so I decided to open my mouth.

"Uh, guys can I –"

They had already started walking out the door of the Dot, as I heard the 'ping' of the doorbell. "Ooops," said Manny, tugging Toby and Jay out with her. "Sorry, JT, we gotta go, catch you later,"

"Call ya soon!" yelled Toby, as Emma pushed his head away. "Hope we're still on for our movie!"

"Totally!" I yelped back. Realizing I sounded excited, even when I wasn't all that happy at the moment. Because here I was, at the Dot, stuck here with Liberty. I couldn't just make up some excuse and leave for no reason. No matter how badly I wanted to. This was going to be an extremely awkward lunch. One I hadn't planned on having.

She didn't turn and face me, like she was purposely looking away from me. Jeez, it's been like three years. You'd think she'd get over it. Yeah, but then again, what I put her through . . .

I couldn't just stand there trying to think of something to say forever though. I bit my lip, and tapped her shoulder. She stiffened, and faced me. "So, uh . . . you wanna sit down or . . . um . . ."

Liberty sat before I even had a chance to finish. I sat down awkwardly in front of her, tapping my foot. She obviously heard, because she looked up and I instantly stopped. I blinked twice, waiting for her to say something. She didn't. I was going to have to start this conversation.

"Um . . . so, how've ya been?"

She paused, fingering with her nails. "Good. You?"

"Yeah, same."

It was just as awkward as I imagined it being. Not that I imagined this or anything . . . "College, you know. Toronto's a weird town to go to university in."

Liberty chuckled, she actually chuckled. "Lucky, I wish I went to school here,"

I nodded softly, "Smithdale, huh?" A stupid thing to say, she was probably wondering how I knew what college she went to. And then I remembered that Emma and Manny had went to the same collge for a while.

"Yep. Smithdale," she nodded, and I desperatley wished that I could get her to say more. Not that I actually cared that much or anything.

"Liberty?" I said, daring myself to say something I didn't want to. I did want to, I will admit that. This whole thing was ridiculous, two people who know each other _a little too well _acting like they knew nothing about the other. It was stupid. She looked up at me, and when she did, I chickened out immeaditley. "Uh . . . I'm gonna go get us coffee," she started to say something, but I stopped her. "I know your order."

And for the slightest second, I saw her smile. Liberty actually smiled at me, for the first time in who knows how long. Short lived or not, it was at least something.

As soon as I ordered and sat back down two minutes later, the something was evidently gone from her face. I handed her the mug, and she nodded, "Thanks,"

"Your welcome," I answered quietly. I sipped, trying to think of something to do or say next. I watched silently over the edge, as her hair fell into her face, chuckling so she wouldn't hear me. Thankfully, she did not.

Liberty had to know that I wasn't as stupid as she thought I was. I knew she hated my guts, well maybe she hated me. She had done a pretty good job of avoiding me the past two years, that was for sure. I mean, I know that I'm a really bad person for her to be around. That I shouldn't be around her at all.

I cleared my throat awkwardly, and tapped my fingers on the side of the mug. This was ridiculous. "Liberty?" I asked finally. She looked up quietly. "We've known each other since grade seven, and all of a sudden, it's like we just met. What's up?"

"Nothing," she whispered.

"It's not 'nothing,' and you know it. You don't have to like me, but we should at least catch up," Liberty blushed like she was thinking about it for a minute. She scrunched her eyebrows together, which brought out her shyness into the forefront. Finally, she nodded.

"Fine. Alright then, what did you want to talk about?"

I hadn't thought of that. Conversation came easily with me, but not by Liberty. "H-How's life?"

"In general?"

"Yes," I answered. "I mean, like – Manny said you'd been . . . sad for a while,"

Her expression changed, into what looked like anger, and I knew that I shouldn't have said that. "I-I'm sorry –" I began. Liberty stopped me.

"No, JT, it's fine. Um . . . yes, for a while – it's done . . ."

"You're okay, now?"

She nodded. I was aware almost instantly, that she was depressed again. I remembered years ago, when she had suffered from post pardum depression, and it propably wasn't back. It would have been more than sadness, and Manny would've told me.

"Well . . . t-that's good,"

"And you? How's your life been going?" she asked, nervously and I shrugged.

"Could be better, but better than it has been. Mia and I are doing great –" and as soon as it came out of my mouth, I instantly regretted it. As I said earlier, Liberty and Mia had never gotten along very well. And I doubt that would ever changed. I shut my mouth instantly.

"Oh . . ."she said, "You're still with Mia?"

I nodded.

"Wasn't she supposed to graduate today? I didn't see her – "

"She's a model now,"

"Of course she is," Liberty said matter-of-factly.

I shook my tounge around in my mouth, shifting uncomfortably. Why had I brought that up? It would probably just make this even more awkward. "You know what, this is stupid. Liberty, why can't we just be friends?'

"Because it's impossible," she answered

"It's not impossible. It's just something we haven't chosen to do,"

"Because you make it that way,"

"What?"

"Yes, you do. You make it so that I just fall –" she stopped herself, and I knew what she was going to say before she said it. _You make it so I fall right back in love with you. _Uh, great. Just another reason why this wasn't supposed to work.

"I don't make it that way,"

"Yeah, you do. Maybe not on purpose – but it's accidental. And it kills me."

I felt like crap as soon as she said that. Was I really that clueless or was she just nonchalant in how she pointed things out? I flashed back to senior year, trying to think of any details I could remember. November and December were both blurry, thanks to that stupid coma. The rest – I was in recovery for three weeks after that (forcing me into summer school, yeah my last free summer ruined, I know) The rest of the year was just Mia and I having fun, Toby and I hanging out, Emma and Manny reminding me to be careful . . . I couldn't remember Liberty at all. Which was odd, considering their history. All I could remember of her, was some interaction about Isabella . . . weird. I felt like there was something else, that I was forgetting . . .

"You –you know I don't mean it like that. I mean – we've –"

"Known each other since grade seven."

"Time passes by quickly," I sigh, remembering how simple things used to be. Of course, things weren't always great back then. I was even more of an idiot back then, then I am now. I didn't think that was possible.

"Too slowly, if anything," she whispered under her breath and I raised an eyebrow.

"What do you mean?"

"Nothing . . . just . . . you were . . . right . . ." she made a pained face, like it was hard to admit. " . . . I do miss you,"

I smiled, "Good. I miss you too. Can we be friends – or not? In advance, I'm sorry if I make you uncomfortable,"

She giggled, and I grinned once more. Liberty nodded, and my spirit lifted smoothly. "Friends . . . that sounds nice,"

And for the rest of the evening, it seemed like everything was just as I hoped it would. We talked about pretty much everything that we had done this past year in University, and I listened to her explain about how Emma had gotten expelled, how their roommate was a guy as there had been a mix up in room assignments, and how racist a bunch of girls had been to her. She didn't tell me why they stereotyped her, as I pretty much figured it out myself. I told her about how I hated college, because it was boring, and everyone there was stuck up and obnoxious.

It felt good, just like we could hang out again and things could be normal. Until Mia gets here, when she kills me for talking to Liberty . . . We moved on to another topic – home lifes. It had always been an awkward topic between us, and yet, it seemed like it was coming easier in conversation then expected. She asked me about my grandmother, and I replied by saying she was doing well. I should have said more, because I was going to have to ask her now.

Liberty didn't get along well with her parents . . . in all honesty – she hated them. I had never been sure why, but she always just pushed off the topic. I remembered vaguely, her coming to school in tears for a while. "Um . . . how are your parents?" I questioned awkwardly.

She tensed up a bit, and I bit my lip. "Fine,"

"So . . . you're not fighting with them anymore?"

"No, it's still the same. They still – they're still – let's just say they have the same opinion of me as they had in high school,"

I sighed, that was my fault, what they thought of her. If I wasn't an idiot . . . they wouldn't treat her like garbage. "JT?" she said. I looked up. "Please don't be upset about it. They just . . . we have issues,"

"People get over said 'issues,'"

Liberty looked at the ground, obviously getting my subtlty. "It's not just that . . . it's other stuff too . . . you wouldn't understand . . ."

"I'm sure I would," I contradicted.

She shook her head, "You wouldn't, it's stupid,"

"It can't be that stupid,"

"Well it is, _and_ it's embaressing, so I'd rather not talk about it," We finished the argument then, and it seemed like the rest of the afternoon was spent hiding secrets from each other. Just how I wanted the summer to start off.

I couldn't wait for Mia to get here.


End file.
